Ten ways to tell if you're British

The British rule when it comes to doing odd things out of a sense of politeness - here are some sure fire ways to tell is you're suffering from a bout of over-Britishness.

  1. You have an obsessive compulsion to apologise, even when it’s not your fault
  2. You wonderwhat you’ve done to incur such wrath on receiving an e mail ending ‘Regards’
  3. You buy something that you really don’t want out of fear that ‘just browsing’ will offend the sales assistant
  4. You resign yourself to never speaking to 'that' person again because you didn’t quite catch their name
  5. You find yourself telling the hairdresser that your new hairstyle / colour is great despite crying inside and deciding to go to the next Supercuts you come across and haveyour head shaved.
  6. You obsessively discusswhat the weather forecast says rather than simply looking out the window to see what the weather is like and feeling the need to say ‘well, the weather forecast said that it was going to …’
  7. Using your best shuffling motion, you Inchforward at the slightest movement ofthe person in front of you in the queue lest anyone should spot a gap and jump in front of you
  8. You say‘it’s fine’ when the deli counter person says “it’s just under the 200g that you asked for” and gives you 170g, even though the recipe calls for 200g – you can always buy a pre-wrapped block of cheese from the refrigerator aisle to make up the rest right?
  9. You join a queue in the pub that trails back to the door whilst the rest of the bar is empty, despite being apoplectic with inner rage and the ridiculousness of peoplefor fear of being judged ‘rude’
  10. You tryto hide your PIN number from the eager ‘shoulder hoverer’ as you pay for your shopping; but casually – you wouldn’t want that stranger to think that you don’t trust them.

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